Hello to my BeaYOUtiful Tribe! Happy July!
Can you believe we are on the second half of the year? Time flies. If you haven't tackled your goals for this year yet, now's the time! Make each day count.
Speaking of goals ...
As you probably know, Paperback Writers is available in all major retailers on eBook and paperback formats. June was a very busy month, as the authors of Paperback Writers visited various reading groups in Facebook to share fun facts about their stories. We truly had a blast! My most sincere thanks to Jennifer Locklear and her Stargazers Squad, Nancee Cain and her Cain Raisers, Sydney Logan and her Sydney's Sweethearts, Nina Bocci and Sylvain Reynard from SR's Fox Den, and the DM Bookclub Party House.
During my takeover on SR's Fox Den, I shared an outtake of my story, Tinderella — a modern and comedic retelling of Cinderella. In this outtake, my narrator gets exposed when she shares with the audience her true intentions to accept this gig. You could say she was using me. What for? See for yourself. ;)
NOTE: This outtake is not part of my published story in Paperback Writers. You can only find it in this website.
MEET THE SASSY FAIRY GODMOTHER (TINDERELLA'S OUTTAKE)
“Once upon a time.”
How many times did these four words make you feel joy? The plethora of emotions running through our veins after every story left us feeling exhilarated. A story starting with “Once upon a time” usually ends with “And they lived happily ever after.” And, let’s be real. Who doesn’t want a happily ever after?
All the princess’ stories begin with this well-known phrase. The illustrious words open a magical portal leading us where we can be witnesses of the immense power of love in the lives of our protagonists.
If you love romance, you are here for a treat. But first, let me introduce myself.
Hi. I’m your narrator. My name is Fairie. My specialty is narrating princess-like love stories. I love happy endings. The author of this story, MJ, didn’t have prior experience with narrators, so she hired me.
I only have one condition: if the story doesn’t have a happy ending, I don’t narrate it. Simple.
Based on my lengthy four weeks experience, I suggested MJ to set forth the narration of this love story with the legendary words, but after a long debate consisting of big words such as litigation and prosecution, she came to the conclusion that I had no creativity and warned me to stay away from citing any famous quotes. I think she’s afraid Disney might come after her to sue her. If they do, a) I won’t get paid, b) I’ll be immediately fired, and c) I’ll be responsible for paying all her legal fees.
The story of my life. A chain of tragic events. It’s hard to find people who appreciate real talent, but all will be worth it if I make my dream come true and be Sylvain Reynard’s new narrator. I have no doubts that if Sylvain Reynard knew me, he would reconsider keeping his Snarky Narrator. He would hire me, The Sassy Fairy Godmother — my artistic name since that’s a thing if you want to be famous.
I have no connections with Mr. Reynard, so I respectfully asked MJ if she could help me. She answered back with a resounding no, refusing the idea of interrupting him from writing the fourth book in the Gabriel Series for something so trivial. She was very adamant making it clear she won’t intercede for me until I have proven myself worthy.
Between you and me, I know the real reason is she’s afraid Mr. Reynard will realize that I’m smarter and more talented than her. I outshine her.
Speaking of talent, I’d like to make a necessary disclaimer before starting to depict this story. MJ is .. good. But let’s face it. She’s not Sylvain Reynard, right? I’m trying to help her but she’s stubborn and Puerto Rican, a dangerous combination in a woman.
As per MJ’s instructions, I’ll be reading the story as she wrote it.
But the fact that this story didn’t begin with “Once upon a time” makes evident her lack of experience. Nothing to worry, though. I got you! I will fill you in with any important detail I find essential.
“Keep wasting the time of my readers and you’ll have to work for free.” A low and menacing velvety voice emerges behind me, taking me by surprise.
“Shit!” The tone of my voice arises a few decibels at the same time the distance between my seat and backside increases. When it finally lands back onto the white leather swivel chair, I slowly start turning around to face the brown-haired and curvy petite; curvy on the front, curvy on the sides, and curvy on her back. Her arms are crossed on her chest, and her furious, piercing eyes are on me. Her left eyebrow is raised up in disapproval and her lips pressed to a thin line.
Needless to say, she doesn’t look happy to see me. At all.
The gate of her lips opens and a low, rumbly voice surfaces from the depths of the threatening creature in front of me. Her gaze feels like sharp daggers cutting me into pieces to be offered as a sacrifice for the writing gods.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Her impassive demeanor makes me nervous.
I know when I’m in trouble.
I’m in trouble. Think, Fairie. Think!
“Hi, MJ! I was just introducing myself to your audience… You have readers, don’t you?”
I swear I see her face emblazing like a volcano in eruption. Scorching magma. Soon, smoke will emerge from her crimson red ears.
I try to fist-pump her but she stays as still as a statue.
This walking mountain of bubbling lava will blow out soon, leaving me in ashes to be spread across the Everglades, along with the giant pythons and alligators population. I must do something quickly or my possibilities to work with Mr. Reynard will vanish faster than the Avengers in Infinity War.
Thank goodness I’m brilliant and always find the right thing to say.
“Relax, girl! You have NOTHING to worry about.” I widen my round brown eyes and flash her my most assuring million dollar smile. I can be empathetic and supportive.
“If you don’t have readers yet it’s okay. I mean, we all start from zero, right? I promise to do all in my power to bring you hundreds. No! Thousands! Thousands of readers. We’re going to be famous, Twinsy!!!”
Excitement pours in abundance through my pores as every word slips from my red lips.
I’m excited! She’s not. Why isn’t she excited?
I don’t get why she doesn’t look as thrilled as I am. I thought it couldn’t be possible, but she looks even more flushed. Her face muscles are tense. The more her fists clench, the more her jaw tightens.
Geez! What’s wrong with her? I’m trying to be a good friend.
She closes her eyes and breathes deeply before mumbling something I don’t understand. I’ve read about this. I think it’s a coping mechanism. Surely by now, she has her little meditation ritual down to a T and only has to repeat it twice in order to regain her composure. I’m so proud of her!
“Fairie, let me remind you of something really important.”
She’s smiling! I knew she’d appreciate my help! Her tone is more friendly. She’s speaking too slowly, though. As if I were a child.
“I need you to listen to me carefully. This is not about you. I gave you the opportunity to share the story of a modern-day Cinderella. Do you understand?”
I nod slowly, quite confused.
“Good. That’s what my readers are expecting to hear from you. That’s what I also expect from you. Nothing else.
“With that being said, can you please stop talking and narrate the damn story. NOW!”
That I understand! Besides, I’ve always been good at following instructions. Well… more or less.
Tinderella is a romantic comedy and I can tell you right now without any hesitation, my true intentions are to make you laugh and make you forget at least for a moment of all those curves life throws at us from time to time. I firmly believe that laughing is the best medicine. It was the first story I've written in third person and it was so much fun!
Did you read Tinderella? Do you think Fairie did a good job narrating the story? Leave your comments below! If you haven't, no worries. I got you. :)
Apple Books: apple.co/30flJs6
For those of you celebrating, Happy Fourth of July!